OMG I started the day so early and got off as intended with the addition to my morning internal work practise: emotional expression followed by some journalling and a run and hill sprints in the rain before the kids were up.
I was feeling good!
But this afternoon when I returned back to my laptop to write and get shit done, I just faffed about being “busy”with TO DO’s, Facebook and NON-ESSENTIAL stuff. I have WASTED LITERALLY HOURS.
And I am ANNOYED myself NO END. It’s not that I always have to be productive… well OK it IS that I always have to be productive. I LOVE to achieve things I set out to do.
The issue I have is a default backlash to ROUTINE and self-imposed DEADLINES.
I resist it massively when it comes to CREATING. I crave the FREEDOM to create but feel restricted by the routine or deadline.
Which means BIG TIME PROCRASTINATION!
What I am learning to recognise is that I do actually DO routine well in some areas of my life such as; health and fitness, more morning practises, spending time my children.
I know that by scheduling them in they actually GET DONE with a sense of commitment, focus and presence.
I also know now how to get myself into a state of flow more readily so there really is NO GOOD REASON NOT TO SHOW UP AND PERFORM!
So why don’t I?
Because I haven’t made it a NON-NEGOTIABLE.
I haven’t actually DECIDED to.
I just THINK I have.
There is of course a BIG difference between understanding the benefits of doing something and ACTUALLY DECIDING to do it.
But this isn’t a decision I need to make about the fact that ROUTINE provides the SPACE for me to create or that DEADLINES GET STUFF DONE or that I will no longer procrastinate.
The real decision I need to make a non-negotiable is that I CAN HAVE IT ALL ON MY TERMS. NOW.
You see, I want to do the stuff I want to do all. day. long. I want to write, speak, coach and create to empower, uplift and inspire.
I know it is not only POSSIBLE but ENTIRELY WITHIN MY POWER.
If only I would EMBRACE ROUTINE and quit seeing myself as undisciplined and recognise that in actual fact I VERY disciplined when I set my mind to it, then I would achieve my dreams a hell of a lot quicker. In the very moment of actually showing up to my routine AND performing I DO HAVE IT ALL. NOW. And I would be on the way to have MORE of it all!
So I am making a statement that I am DECIDING (once again but FOR REAL this time) that I CAN and WILL and DO HAVE IT ALL. NOW.
I now choose to SCHEDULE MY TIME to ALLOW me to do what I love AND the specific tasks that will ALLOW me to do MORE of what I love.
I now choose to embrace routine, to see myself as someone who is disciplined to get what needs to bet done in compressed chunks of time.
I choose to HAVE IT ALL. NOW.
It is DONE!
PS If you are frustrated with your procrastination and resistances and seeming lack of follow through and know that YOUR EMOTIONS end up IN CHARGE, JOIN The Dark Side Revolution (Private FB Group) – a safe and supportive space for women to express and release their overwhelming emotions and limiting beliefs. The time to live your dreams is always NOW. You just need to shift the shit that’s in your way of giving yourself the permission to do so. But you don’t need to do it alone! There are tools and techniques and like-minded women for support. So request to join the group NOW! I look forward to welcoming you on the other (dark) side. x